Hinggil sa taho

Taho ang pambansang agahan namin ng mga kaibigan ko nung nagko-call center pa kami. Pagpatak ng alas singko ng umaga, diretso agad kami sa labas ng gate sa may Jupiter St. at nakaabang na dun si kuyang magtataho. Madalas nakakadalawang malaking baso ako ng taho, at minsan kahit pag-uwi ko at nakakasalubong ako ng magtataho ay nakakabili’t nakakakain pa. Awa naman ni Lord ay di naman sumasakit ang tiyan ko.

Hindi ko talaga gusto ang taho. Naalala ko nung highschool kahit anong pilit ng tropa kong pakainin ng taho ay sinusuka to talaga siya. Kahit tokwa ayaw na ayaw ko, kasi parang ngumunguya ako ng basang papel. Pero noong lumuwas ako para magtrabaho kinailangan ko siyang kainin. Dahil may mga panahong wala akong pera. At taho, at tokwa ang mura.

Ngayon, gustong-gusto ko na sila. Paborito ko na sila.

Pero sa ngayon ay madalang na lang akong makakain ng taho. Dahil dito sa aming lugar sa probinsiya hindi araw-araw ay may maririnig kang “tahoooooo!” sa kalsada. Kaya naman kaninang may dumaang magtataho, dali-dali akong lumalabas para bumili. Kahit bente pesos ang isang baso niya ay ayos na rin. Choosy pa ba ako.

When your blog goes on retirement

When I started blogging, I only had the goal of pouring my grief over my dead cat. Blogging used to be a way to explore interests, a personal online journal of some sorts (unlike today, blogging is either dead or used for marketing business). Over time, I begin to like blogging- writing and sharing thoughts that comes to my mind, even my own hobbies and interests.

Blogger used to be the best platform for beginners like me because it’s easy to navigate. And during peak blogging years I have opened and read so many blogs that offer their insights and their hobbies. You can just log in to your account, write, publish, and that’s it. But of course, a blogger also gets busy with life, with new ventures, family and other personal matters. So, what happens when bloggers decide to stop writing and the updates stop coming?

In my case, I deleted my first blog. Nowadays I still see some archived screenshots of it. Others decide to archive their works by letting it live online until whenever (or until Google decides to shut down Blogger). Just like Susan Scott and Loretta Chase’s Two Nerdy History Girls blog. It’s one of the blogs I’ve been checking out and reading since it opened late 2000s. Through their posts, I discovered and read some of the novels they’ve recommended.

Rhonda Hetzel’s Down To Earth blog also went into retirement a few months ago. I used to read her posts about her home and garden, and her insights to simple and frugal living. Another blog I used to follow, How About Orange decided to archive the blog 11 years ago. I first discovered this blog when I was searching online for patterned wallpapers. The owner, Jessica Jones is a designer shares her works, and I was drawn to it (also because orange is my favorite color). She offers tutorials and lovely printables which are still online.

With today’s era of business-centric and AI generated articles and posts, it’s still nice to see bloggers genuinely writing and sharing what they love online. And I’m even more thankful to these bloggers I mentioned, because unlike me, they decide to keep their blogs online for people to read and become sources. Well, to be fair, my old blog isn’t really ‘educational’, so best to have it off the internet.

I feel like I don’t belong to anyone’s memories (a.k.a Geloy Concepcion’s words that resonate with me as the ‘background friend’)

I feel like I don’t belong in anyone’s memories.

I’m such a bland person. So generic, just someone on the sides during get-togethers. A filler when someone’s needed. The last option when there’s really no one else. I don’t even know why I see myself this way.

I feel like I don’t contribute anything to the things happening around me. When I’m at gatherings with people whom I consider friends, I try to join in, start conversations, laugh with them. But eventually, I end up in the background again, just smiling and nodding along to their stories. And even though I remember a lot of memories with my friends during those moments, sometimes I wonder… do they remember anything about me? Do I matter to them at all?

Sometimes I blame myself, because I’ve always been like this. I wish that even just once; I could’ve stood out a bit. Maybe then they’d remember me. But maybe they will, in a way. “Oh, that one who’s always smiling, the one who just nods, always in the back, that person…” At least they’ll remember me, right? Better than nothing. Hahaha, what an annoying thought.

Anyway, I don’t want to self-pity. Sometimes I just wonder what I really am in the eyes of the people around me.

Short Review: Libing Isa

 

Who should one fear? The deceased, the living, or us?

This question caught my attention when I first saw it online a few weeks ago. It was a teaser for a new book by an artist whose work I was already familiar with because I frequently see it on Twitter. I pre-ordered a book right away and promptly forgot about it as I went about my day. And even though it arrived yesterday afternoon, I didn't get a chance to unbox and read it until before bed.

Libing Isa is the debut book by Filipino author and illustrator Malayo Pa ang Umaga (MPAU), published by Anino Comics. It is composed of 11 stories about death, fears, and other macabre things that make us not want to sleep at night. The author claims that his fascination with the number eleven is what inspired the book's title. In his words:

"Para sa akin, kakaiba ang labing-isa (eleven) dahil nag-iiwan ito ng "hindi kumpletong" impresyon. Hindi pa buo kasi hindi pa isang dosena. Hindi pa hatinggabi, pero malapit na. Patapos na ang taon, pero parang hindi pa. Muntik na o kaunti na lang. Kulang pa. Papunta pa lang."

("For me, the number eleven is strange because it leaves an "incomplete" impression. It's incomplete because there aren't a dozen of them yet. It's not yet midnight, but it's getting close. It's almost the end of the year, but it doesn't seem like it yet. Almost or barely. Not enough, but getting there.")

Of course, I have my favorites out of the 11 short stories.

Right off the bat, the first short story, Makakalimutin si Tin (Forgetful Tin), sent chills down my spine. It starts with an illustration of Tin running and describes how she often forgets some of her things at school. Tin is always excited to go home, completely forgetting even her best friend. But why is Tin always in a hurry to go home?

Si Maning at ang Diwata ng Kangkungan (Maning and the Water Spinach Field Fairy) is about a young boy's friendship with a lady living beneath the vast water spinach field and his impending discovery of how the lady ended up underwater.

Ang Kasaysayan ng Bigas (The History of Rice) narrates how our favorite Filipino staple food is made, from planting to harvesting, milling, and selling, and how a little girl's father contributes to this rigorous process.

Mabangong Pagdating (A Fragrant Arrival) is a story about a boy's first day (and night) in the province. It is similar to Shake, Rattle, and Roll's Aswang but with a different plot.

Along with the stories, the book is beautifully illustrated throughout by MPAU. His style of art is quite similar to that of Filipino-American illustrator Bong Redila, but MPAU's works are more often dark and eerie. Perhaps this is a result of his ominous subject and the use of bold strokes. Nevertheless, they are as fascinating as his words. The cover is equally impressive as well.

Overall, Libing Isa is an absolute page-turner and a keeper. It reminds me of the literary folios we used to publish back in my university days. It is original and well-written. It's undoubtedly an excellent addition to the genre.

Libing Isa is available for sale at Adarna House.